If you have broken up with someone for the first time or possibly the third, yet you want them to give you another chance, then there is good news. It is possible and not all that difficult. A shocking number of breakups are not permanent because of how difficult it is to let go of someone who you love. The tips below will help you convince someone that you are worth a second chance and see that the relationship is worth revisiting. Even if things do not work out, each relationship teaches us something about ourselves and others. Be willing to learn and grow no matter what the outcome.
One of the most important things to remember when you want a second chance is to give your ex some time and space to be able to breathe. If you bombard them with texts, calls, and emails then they will pull further a way out of need. Find a balance between romantic wooing and allowing time to be missed. As you give them time to breathe, get yourself spiritually and emotionally healthy. You are most attractive when healthy and happy. A person who is both happy and healthy is hard to let go of and your ex will gravitate toward you. Asking someone for a second chance is not about manipulation or convincing, but about learning from the experience so you can become a better person. Read on to learn how to start.
Apologize
Apologizing for your attitudes and actions that led to the breakup is a powerful way to lead to the make up with your ex. You are both likely feeling defensive and in pain, possibly scared and confused, but a sincere apology and recognition of your faults will be a huge step in reconciliation. This is not a half-apology that also blames the other person, but taking your share of the responsibility. Go further by saying what you have learned from the breakup and why your love is stronger, if it is, as well as what you will avoid doing in the future.
Discuss the Reasons
Whatever you have done, cheating, lying, or anything else, your ex deserves answers. Share the details and how things progressed as well as why you will never do it again. Talk about ways to avoid this in the future by pinpointing the reason you broke up and then discuss ways you will protect yourself and a relationship from facing the same issue. Though this discussion may be tough and even painful, do not avoid it. This is part of reconciling and closing a horrible chapter. Share what is deep in your heart.
Change Your Lifestyle
If you are not clear on the reason you broke up, seek advice from others, and the source when possible. If the cause was working too much, drinking too much, or spending too much then pinpoint the cause and make some changes. If you want to convince your ex to give you another chance then accept your new boundaries and limits. This will help rebuild trust because you are willing to make reasonable changes. You may also need to be willing to consider counseling or couple’s therapy. One of the biggest obstacles to getting back together is a lack of communication, so a conscious effort needs to be made.
Discuss the Differences in Your Life
Be willing to discuss how you and your habits are changed after the breakup. It should serve as a wake-up call that changes your habits and perspective that will continue if you make up with your ex. Go a step further and ask your ex what changes they would like to see. As you discuss getting back together, talk about the changes you both need without blaming the other person. To save the relationship, you will both need some change, but you must learn to communicate as a couple first. Make this part of the overall apology that is both humble and real.
More Than Talk
Remember, talk alone is meaningless. Just talking about changes is not enough, especially if the problems have presented before. So, as you talk, go to counseling, read about relationship improvement, and change your habits to demonstrate your commitment to getting make together and doing better. Do not assume you know why the other person left or what they are thinking, have a real conversation to get to the heart of the matter.
Listen
Though it may be difficult, listen to your ex’s thoughts and perspectives about what happened, from start to finish. Just listen without interrupting and without trying to convince them otherwise. Put your feelings aside until they run out of things to say, it is about saving your relationship. Convincing someone to offer a second chance is about setting aside your own views and seeing things from the other person’s perspective. A counselor can help you work through your feelings if needed.
Make a Sweet Gesture
One of the traditional ways of winning someone back is through a romantic gesture. Flowers may be cliché, but they are so for a reason. Add some chocolates and a note saying you are sorry and wish to talk. Remember, it is a combination of all these things that offer the best chance at reconciliation, but it will not happen overnight. At times, nothing will work and you have to move on, letting go.